How to homeschool multiple children esp when they are at different study grades? When you have a baby and / or toddler to manage to?

Question : Multiple Children

How to homeschool multiple children esp when they are at different study grades?
when you have a baby and / or toddler to manage to?

SM: 2 sons/ 1 daughter

I had this issue when my daughter was born and my younger one was 2 years old and older one was 6 years old.

I decided to get a maid for the baby from breakfast until lunch. I continued with that maid until my daughter was 3. She would feed (solids) and change and shower and burp. I would nurse and hand the baby to her. As she turned 2 I trained the maid to start doing activities with her.. puzzles.. sensory activities.. beads.. pouring etc.. all under my supervision.. in the next room so she was also being homeschooled..

Meanwhile I would send my 2 year old to art and reading classes in the morning (to a young religious teenage girl who loved children) because he was very hyper and wouldn't let me work with my 6 year old.. I also put him in a day care during the morning time at one point and taught him one in one in the afternoon.

At different times when my 2 year old was willing to sit and focus I was able to teach him and my 6 yr old side by side. During this time I would work with one and give the other one a hands on activity he can do one his own (ex. Writing, puzzles etc) and then switch back and forth.

At this point my youngest is 3 n very eager to 'work' with her brothers.. I have written work prepared for all of them and seat them in different places in the room far from each other (to prevent fights and distractions).. then I move from kid to another to do the reading and explaining parts.. they have to raise their hands if they need help n wait until I can come to them..

They love being graded so I grade them with a red coloring pencil (they chose the color cuz they said that's what teachers use) and I try to make the 3 year old feel that her work is important and needs to get done so she cooperates more. I also tell her if she doesn't follow instructions she will have to leave the school room (that's usually the ultimate horror for her so she cooperates)

I recently made tickets for each kid in different colors.. each ticket has the subjects that kid needs to do.. and they finish a subject they home punch it and when they're finished.. the ticket is used to get screen time.

I can't remember if I shared the tickets pics on here.. so I will paste them again.. basically I've found any incentive charts etc where a child visually sees their progress makes them so much more cooperative..

There would be many times where I had no choice but to teach with little ones around.. I would give them chalk.. white board markers.. glitter glue.. oil pastels.. color pencils.. etc n sit them where I can keep an eye on them.. while I teach the older child..

Ive also changed my timings around based on the situation. Rite after my daughter was born I was too tired to teach in the mornings so I started doing home time in the evenings for some time..
Another idea that works really well with toddlers is junk bags.. I'd put them in my closet n use them when I needed to make wudu and pray.. but ofcourse they can be used at any time.. I took bags and filled them with safe junk.. interesting things that otherwise you would've thrown away.. so it doesn't require any work or effort..

Then randomly take out one bag at a time.. n the smaller child can play with it..
You can also make busy bags and tot trays for them n make an area for them where their stuff is so they can choose activities from there.. but that works better once they're closer to 2 n can focus in on an activity for more than 10 seconds..I only had a maid for the house at that point..

Somehow it was doable with two kids.. when Ibrahim was crawling and Mohammad had to do an art activity.. I'd barricade him in an area with chairs or other things so Ibrahim couldn't get close enough to mess around..

 I'd sit on the dining table with Mohammad and put out Ibrahim's toys on the ground and let him play around.. I'd also homeschool while I fed Ibrahim and also while he napped..

 

SAA: I remember setting up too kids on top of tables with plastic fold-able
Still Mana will pull herself up and babble and be cheeky to distract them

 

SM: Nadia..  I personally feel like there is nothing wrong with screen time.. as long as it educational (or neutral) and limited(in terms of time).. our kids have to be familiar with devices..

I've downloaded so many helpful apps.. we have separate homeschooling folders with the homeschooling apps.. trace letters.. learn to read.. phonics.. simulation.. geography.. maps.. Quran reading.. reading books.. read to me books.. and much more..
Devices.. tv.. computers.. and yes even Facebook.. many people talk about their evils.. but we need to use them for all the benefit they provide..

 

Umm Salar : SM while I agree to what you say somewhat. I also respect that every parent has their own way and rules as to how they conduct screen time for their children- I think children have a hard time understanding limits. And unlimited screen time - even educational can do more harm than good. That's just what I personally believe....that's why I often talk about how important it is to monitor our children when they're online.

http://nypost.com/2016/08/27/its-digital-heroin-how-screens-turn-kids-into-psychotic-junkies/ 

But of course- used correctly it may have some benefits.
But I wish we could teach our kids to be more hands on- before they move onto digital devices-- But that's just my _personal_ view point again :)

 

SM: On the contrary.. I feel that children understand limits very well.. they understand that mom is praying and will not answer.. they learn that it's futile to fight showers.. they will have to take them.. they understand when no means no.. n when no means yes..

Yes I agree.. hands on is definitely very important for kids..

 

Umm Salar : Well I don't agree. It's differs from child to child. And I'm specifically talking about them handling digital devices. Independently.
Because once a child is addicted to screen time ...and we've seen many examples sadly- they need constant reminders

And it's difficult for them to disengage
 

SM: I agree that yes.. we definitely need to monitor the kids..
 

Umm Salar Hs: Definitely

 

SM: Thats true.. addiction to screen time is a big problem nowadays

It's something we need to be aware of..
 And yes every parent has to choose what rules and guidelines will work for them and their kids

For what works for one may not work for another..

 

Umm Salar : Definitely agreed.
When I see children who are left unmonitored with devices that allow them to be online unsupervised...I just feel so worried for them.

Because they don't know the long term damage they may be in for.
 Do do share some online resources u use. It's always good to have those healthy alternatives under our belts :)

 

Sarah HS: SM I feel so incompetent reading this. I mean I am no where as organized. In my defense my oldest is four and a half. I generally let them choose what they want to do. Lots of reading and that's pretty much it these days. How much structure do kids under five really need? Like how much book work and all..

 

SM: Sarah.. not to worry.. I started homeschooling my oldest when he was 4.. before that he was going to school.. I read and read and read to him..

when you hear from homeschoolers with kids older than yours.. keep in mind what they're sharing has taken them years to do.. so take ideas that apply to u today.. I remember when I started I couldn't search homeschooling stuff online.. I would get overwhelmed and wouldn't know what to do.. even now I focus until 5th grade.. when my kid gets there.. then I will think beyond..

And also try to do things that suit your personality.. I'm a free spirit.. I don't like being caged into one specific curriculum.. so I take material from various places for one subject.. but as my oldest son has gotten older.. I've learned to tame down a bit .. in some ways .. and stick to one main source for one subject n then supplement.. but I still like going off the curriculum and doing my own thing.. n letting my son do his own thing..

Learning to homeschool is like when u first learn to cook or when u have your first child.. it's very new and it takes time to figure out how to do it and get a feel of things.. then once u figure out your own system.. it gets easier.. hope that makes sense..

Sorry for rambling on n on

 

SN: SM  good job Masha'Allah. I agree with u as well... Have a 4 yr old and loving to be his friend. Sarah, Islam emphasizes on education at the age of 7. All you have to do is just be with him. Play with him . And yes educate children through play-  hands on and hands off both 🏼  and reading ti them is the best. We don't realize but our children are picking up every sound and expression we make. Their Bluetooth is on all the the time as far as writing is concerned... Some children are not interested but u make it interesting. If they don't want to write with a pencil, let them do finger writing with paint. It write In sand. Once I took an old jhaaru and gave my son a bucket with some water . He used that as a paint brush and painted with water on the walls outside lol. Sounds crazy but children enjoy such things

 

SM: Also I suggest you read up on the different type homeschooling philosophies..
 For me.. changing the way I looked at education.. changed the way I taught.. when you go in from a school approach.. the aim is the result.. but for homeschoolers the process of getting to the result is very important..

For example..
Schoolers wanna know your grade.. homeschoolers focus on developing the love of learning..

 

Umm Salar Hs: Well said SM That's really insightful It's amazing how just reading everyone's experience here is so reassuring and strengthening..Alhamdulilah
 

Mrs AH: 2 sons,7 and 15

My eldest was 11 when the youngest was 3.Since I don't believe that kids under the age of 6 need any formal education it allowed me to keep more focused on my elder son and keep my youngest tag along in real life activities and learn experiential .

SAA:

Having children of different ages was the best part of homeschooling experience

Since 11 and 12 year old ones were doing  Quantum physics last month I was shocked to hear my six year old writing a story about her doppelgänger
After asking her
She even told me what it is and how the multiple dimensions or universe work 
So it's not always difficult
For me
It's like having multiple gears
Just make sure that both ages are sitting apart or are doing different types of work or your gear box may break
Children if are engaged and self driven for their learning
Have very diverse ways and pace of learning
What you can do is plan for the big picture realistically for each individual child
One would naturally cover concepts step by step
For him you can make curricular system
To my astonishment I realize that most text books do not teach by building association or relation
So I had to build on each concept
Suppose I want them to cover thermodynamics
I'll read the chapter then point out when
The child observe an unusual phenomenon related to it
Then we do an experiment simple one
The child must take notes on
Observation
Give an inference
Then he find the scientific explanation or hypothesis
The laws related to it
And application in the modern mechanic and nature he writes a report or give presentation his choice
I also want them to appreciate art so these days we are researching French landscape art
A few days ago we were researching the willow pattern late Victorian porcelain 
In these projects we collect pics watch documentaries and write reports do Tuesday bazar or museum excursion
My chief effort is for them to understand how design and concepts evolve
I also make sure the children adapt to the vocabulary
Making check points and achieving them is easy but the amount of knowledge differs
Linear learners are easy to trace but slower and tire easily
While
Abstract ones are tireless
Taking in learning all the time it's just they are interested in everything at the same time
Building a picture or mind palace in their head unique to them alone  observing their learning is like observing a miracle
I have known no subject too complex for the kids
Key is to entice their fascinating and make sure they understand the connections and terms
Keep them asking questions and keep asking yours  
While reading and language
My check points are
Sociology
Psychology and the philosophy of that certain piece of literature
It is mandatory for the child to discuss and resolve the questions before moving on
The child become perceptive to reasons and consequences  of actions
The reason children are hyper or emotionally immature these days is because we  do not let them achieve their full potential the brain can do much much more
I apologize for rambling
But lastly to conclude
From earliest stage I have bought builder toys
Ask the child to make things
The wrestle of neurons with ideas is an exhausting and consuming process
But one that needs distinct psycho motor activity to reinforce them neurologically   
So if child is struggling with complex idea a reinforcement of similar pattern helps them overcome it
I think I answer the curriculum question here too
I apologize if went off topic

RS: 

I believe in exposing things to children as they are...like in hajj and prophet stories, use proper rich language....no need to replace words with childish ones. Children have wonderful memories...they can absorb everything from Tawaf to Saaee to Jamarat, Mina, Rami Arafat Ihram etc. Don't test young children like tell me what I told you about hajj yesterday. Just keep on telling...they will start narrating themselves...

Also focus on the spirit of hajj rather than sequence on rituals. Tell them what they should feel during Tawaf...what feelings of a mothers love and sacrifice should one feel during Saee and what it feels like in Muzdalifa...etc..read up ahle Zauq ka hajj for ideas..

Also tell them how important these days are even for non Haajis. Make them do special good deeds n fast like Ramadan (spiritual sense) during the first week of this month...

Conclusion:

Every family develops to teach their children in the way that suits them .

They may teach different aged children at different times of the day.

Keep little ones busy with activities they can do on their own,  while teaching older children.

They may hire a maid to tend to the little one while the mother teaches the elder ones

They may send some of the  children to a tutor

They may even have older children help teach some of the younger ones

Often children younger than 7 learn through play while the elder siblings have more structured work

The pattern of teaching different aged children by a single family varies and changes as the family grows and matures insha'Allah.
 

 (Note: The above is a copy of a Whatsapp conversation,   partly edited for clarity)